What's wrong when all is well?
Jan. 11th, 2007 10:01 amToday's installment of the webcomic Todd & Penguin struck a chord with me:

Most people who know me socially remark on my generally sunny disposition. In fact, I remember
jhayman asking me once "Are you always that cheerful?" My reply began: "No, but more often than not. I long ago came to the conclusion that you cannot always control what is going on around you, but you can always control how you react to what is going on around you. Positive attitude won't solve all your problems, but a negative attitude will make all your problems worse. So why not go with the better percentage?"
And it's true that this is how I try to live, and many times I succeed. But the flip side of my personality, which not everyone sees, is that I am always worrying about things. What have I missed? What am I not doing right now that I should be doing? What is going to go wrong? It's no wonder that my favourite of Murphy's General Laws is "If everything appears to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something."
I try not to obsess about these things to the point that they paralyze me, and I do make a conscious effort to put a positive spin on things, but the point is that it is a conscious effort. Worrying is my rest state. This is probably why I tend to be very shy of change, and why I always stress more at quarter end when work evaluations are due. Given nothing actually plausible to fret over, I'll invent something to worry about. Am I boring to my sweeties? Have I offended someone terribly and that's why I haven't heard from them lately? Is a piece of the International Space Station about to fall to earth and land on my car?
I don't expect to actually do anything about this, mind you. It's just something to ponder this morning, as I try to recapture my normally blithe spirit in the wake of the last couple of days.

Most people who know me socially remark on my generally sunny disposition. In fact, I remember
And it's true that this is how I try to live, and many times I succeed. But the flip side of my personality, which not everyone sees, is that I am always worrying about things. What have I missed? What am I not doing right now that I should be doing? What is going to go wrong? It's no wonder that my favourite of Murphy's General Laws is "If everything appears to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something."
I try not to obsess about these things to the point that they paralyze me, and I do make a conscious effort to put a positive spin on things, but the point is that it is a conscious effort. Worrying is my rest state. This is probably why I tend to be very shy of change, and why I always stress more at quarter end when work evaluations are due. Given nothing actually plausible to fret over, I'll invent something to worry about. Am I boring to my sweeties? Have I offended someone terribly and that's why I haven't heard from them lately? Is a piece of the International Space Station about to fall to earth and land on my car?
I don't expect to actually do anything about this, mind you. It's just something to ponder this morning, as I try to recapture my normally blithe spirit in the wake of the last couple of days.
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Date: 2007-01-11 03:07 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-11 03:30 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-11 03:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-11 03:43 pm (UTC)Speaking up is probably the best thing you can do for it... and accepting the hugs and concern of friends and sweeties for the love that it is.
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Date: 2007-01-11 04:06 pm (UTC)Quite so. I know that I am blessed that I do not lack for either friends or sweeties.
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Date: 2007-01-11 03:59 pm (UTC)I think I worry more when things are going smoothly than I do when there is actually a crisis to deal with...
The series of emotional blows we took starting with Robert's death and followed by the deaths of my stepmother, mother, and grandfather pretty much put me in an emotional lockdown state. I'm coming out of that after about 5 years. The advantage is that I get to feel joy again. The disadvantage is that I feel pain again.
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Date: 2007-01-11 04:05 pm (UTC)Always here for you to share either. *hug*
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Date: 2007-01-11 04:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-11 05:24 pm (UTC)Wish I could be there more. Wish you could be here more. But I love you. You've been a wonderful ear for me for a decade, I don't mind repaying the favor.
And you're never boring.
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Date: 2007-01-11 05:41 pm (UTC)This was more thoughtfood than anything specific. But I know you're there if I need you. *huggle*
And I am *frequently* boring, but it's nice to know you don't find me so. *grin*
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Date: 2007-01-11 11:44 pm (UTC)When I was a kid, I used to worry that Skylab was falling--and that it was going to fall right through our living room ceiling on top of me!!
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Date: 2007-01-12 01:07 am (UTC)I resemble this remark, I worry too you are not alone.
Good luck to you in all your endeavors.
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Date: 2007-01-12 03:52 am (UTC)I'm not ignoring you, I'm just horrible busy. Oh, and making you a prezzie.
See you in the UK!
*hugs*
LMG
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Date: 2007-01-12 03:54 am (UTC)Very much looking forward to the UK! *bounce*
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Date: 2007-01-12 04:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-12 10:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-15 05:36 pm (UTC)I can't speak with any surety about the rest of it, but I can allay *that* worry, at least.
Nope, not gonna happen. At least not any time this decade.