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I posted this this morning to a newsgroup that I read, but as I look over it, I realize that it's applicable to all online communities, really, and thought it might be something worth putting here too. I've been a member of (and a builder of) many online communities in the 15 years that I've been on the Net, and these are some things that came out of my observations from those experiences.

Newsgroups are more than just asyncronous message boards. They become, ultimately, communities. And like all communities, they develop cultures.

Social newsgroups especially do this, but newsgroups that are primarily for information swapping do it as well. comp.lang.perl has a very distinct culture, as an example.

The other thing that communities do is develop a shared history. People who have lived in and been active in the community share experiences with one another, and this builds bonds between them.

And sure, this *can* be intimidating to the New Kid In Town. Here's a group of people who have laughed together, cried together, shared each others pain, rejoiced in each others small daily triumphs. That creates a group of people who are, in many ways, fiercely loyal to one another. In the best of worlds, it becomes a kind of family. A noisy, sometimes disfunctional family that squabbles amongst itself as often as not. But a family, none the less.

You can't just come and take what you need from here. You can't demand to be a part of this. There's a contract, unspoken, yet as binding as any blood oath. There's a price for sharing this warmth.

That doesn't mean that you can't become a part of this community. Come, learn its ways, observe the paths we walk. See the simple love that grows between people just because they choose to share a piece of their life with others. You can be a part of this. It's a simple choice. A choice, right now, between fear and love.

Come and join it. Give a bit of yourself to the group, unselfishly, unafraid. What you give to the group will be returned to you, and more.

It's your choice.

My $.02

Date: 2003-09-12 09:58 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] otherdeb.livejournal.com
It's kind of like fandom in general, in that anyone can come, but cannot demand that the whole group change to fit him/her. As an example, there is a fan in NY who shall remain nameless. Heesh got a life partner, and told that life partner how open fandom was to newcomers. The life partner took this to mean that fandom had to accept all its behavior, no matter how rude, hurtful, obnoxious, or clueless. And when it finally was gotten through to said life partner that that wasn't gonna fly, it got all bent and decided that the fan had been lying to it about fandom.

Now, in truth, the fan hadn't been. Fandom as a rule is open to whoever walks in, but being tolerant is not the same as being willing to be trod upon over and over again.

Unfortunately, this is what happens in some newsgroups, chat rooms, and other online communities. A new person comes in and rather than seeing how they fit into the group and what they can contribute, they try to force others to accept them. Or they try to prove how much they know. These are the types of things that cause flamewars and groups splitting.

I am in a group I used to love int erms of getting information and support, but it seems to have devolved into two or three arguments that are not even related to the subject at hand. And the arguments have grown into personal attacks on both sides, with huge side orders of sniping from the peanut gallery.

The problem is not with change -- change is, as you state, inevitable; it's with people trying to force their way in, rahter than joining, contributing, and growing into being part of the community.

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